Already half-way through March and I am most definitely feel the benefits of this months resolution to give at least 5 genuine compliments a day. It may be the weather getting warmer, longer daylight hours, or the excitement of up-coming events that has got me beaming but I would also like to salute the compliments of this month.
The first few days required a bit of thought. Looking towards others across my desk or in line beside me at the coffee shop and finding something to admire. That came surprisingly easy and made me realize that I am thinking nice things about people all the time. The hard part was actually saying it out loud. How silly it is that I have a tough time telling a stranger that I think they are beautiful or a co-worker that I admire their work ethic. I like to think of myself as an open and honest individual that can cut through the barriers that society has chosen to put up – but I am still very much a product of my environment.
But after those first few compliments to friends and strangers the words began to flow with ease free of strings. I was also happy to observe that most people excepted the compliments gracefully and I think it even helped bring me closer to someone I work with that in the past had not kept her dislike of me much of a secret.
The area in which I have a ways to go, however, is complimenting myself. Either I forget to do all together or if I remember I then don’t even compliment anything and instead end up getting hung up on something I feel like I need to work on. I don’t consider myself as someone with an abundance of self-hate but I am most certainly not allowing myself to truly self-love.
I am so grateful for the awareness that this last resolution has brought me and I look forward to working on my self-LOVE and forming new relationships with the amazing people that are all around.
The first month of my year of resolutions went good. January was no complaining and although I most definitely complained about this and that I feel the overall benefit of putting that intention forward. Not only did it help me to change some of my inner negative talk but it also influenced others. Even my partners cousins adapted “No complaining” for their own household for the year which I found very inspiring.
Now we enter into February. Where I intend to unplug from my cell phone and ipod and tune into the sounds of the world around me. This means no cellphone in social situations and no ipod while making my way from place to place. There were a few things that motivated this as the choice for February. (Also lets move forward without judgement and instead interest)
1. My boyfriend is constantly on his phone. When we are hanging out at home, when we are walking down the street, in a Car2Go, waiting for a movie to start, and out for dinner. Most of the instances didn’t really bother me but when he spent more time looking at his phone than at me during dinner I started to get impatient about it.
2. I am not really on my phone that much but I am constantly looking at my phone. I don’t know what exactly I am looking for but all day long I gaze at my phone seeing if my little red “message” light is flashing. If it is I will check to see what email or text I may have received. If its not, I will look again in 10 seconds. Also I don’t like to go ANYWHERE without my phone. It is generally within arms reach and I even take it with me on the 15 minute break from work to go and get some take-out.
3. I want to turn off my ipod and turn on my hearing. There are a couple reasons I want to include the ipod. If I am walking, it is always on playing whatever tickles my fancy at that particular moment. This is something I have always loved. Walking, or travelling with music. I have had many magical moments this way where I am often brought to tears by the beauty of the world around me and the power of a song. But I feel as though I am missing out on the sounds of birds, trees in the wind, and people passing by. Also, unfortunately one of my motivations is slightly rooted in fear. I work early most mornings and I up hours before the sun starts peeking its way on to the world. I had a thought that if anyone in those early morning walks wanted to follow me and/or attack me I may not hear it coming.
I am hoping that this will bring me closer to the world as well those around me. In our ever struggle to connect more with others through the internet we are indvertantly disconnecting from people in the ‘real world’. I don’t want it to be considered strange to chat with a stranger or smile at the people passing me by as I walk from place to place. I want to hear more stories of the world in hopes to cultivate more love and less seperation.